Monday, July 13, 2009

What???!! Fox & Friends on Racial Purity

If you get the chance to see The Soup this week, check it out. Joel McHale follows this clip with the perfect reaction. Really the only one possible: jaw-dropping astonishment.


Wednesday, July 08, 2009

I May Not Know Much About Economics, But I Still Know More than Tony Blankley

Let's say you play the same numbers every week in the Lotto. So I buy a ticket with your numbers for one dollar, then offer it to you for two dollars. After all, by next week it could be worth millions.

So you buy it. I made one dollar in profit, and you bought a chance at a fortune for only two dollars

Tony Blankley, like most Republicans, thinks that's "the free market at work." He thinks we just "created wealth."

Yes. But only for me. In a few days, you will almost certainly be stuck with a worthless slip of paper. Sure I doubled my money, but how many times will I be able to run this scam on you before you're fed up? And if I'm running this game to the tune of a hundred or a thousand tickets a week, won't I eventually run out of suckers?

Regulation of the financial industry doesn't hobble businesses, it protects them. From themselves.


Monday, July 06, 2009

Michael Jackson's Children: Anyone Ever See "Village of the Damned"?



Sunday, July 05, 2009

When TV is Out of Order... Literally

Today Fox Reality Channel showed 40 minutes of one episode of Hell's Kitchen, then 20 minutes of another. Such a weird mistake, I couldn't believe things like this could still happen with todays technology. Which reminded me of NBC's legendary 1978 snafu, when part three of the Loose Change miniseries ran on night two. Here is the announcement that aired that night... awkward, to say the least.


At least NBC apologized. Fox Reality either didn't notice, or hoped we wouldn't.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland

I was eager before, but these breathtaking photos only make the waiting more difficult.






Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Trailer: The Invention of Lying

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

What a Good Time to Once Again Enjoy Stephen Colbert's Mark Sanford Interview

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Better Know a Governor - Mark Sanford
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorStephen Colbert in Iraq

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Bob Hope, Bing Crosby and John Wayne Surprise Guest Host Don Rickles on the Tonight Show


Push Push In the Kush

I don't know why, but I feel like buying one of these for every woman I know. And for every woman I don't know. In fact, if they'll keep running this commercial, I promise to just keep buying this incredibly important product.


Thursday, June 11, 2009

Jimmy Fallon Makes Me Laugh, Both Accidentally and On Purpose

First is Jimmy asking if we can help Clay Aiken and Adam Lambert "squash their beef" (!) And yes, I do have a junior high school mentality.


And below that, the very, very funny "Let Us Play With Your Look" co-starring Will Ferrell. I warn you, though, the song is a total Ceti eel (or "earworm" as Stephen King calls them).


Later in that same episode, by the way, Kyra Sedgwick's segment (and Will Ferrell's participation) was a reminder of how great talk shows can be when guests move down the couch instead of fleeing after their plug is done.







Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Aretha Franklin: Nessun Dorma (1998)

I was telling a friend about this, one of the most exciting performances I've ever seen on TV, and decided what the heck, I'll post it here. Along with, of course, the thrilling (and final) performance by Pavarotti himself. Enjoy.




Amazing: A Great Bluetooth Speakerphone




I have tried every bluetooth implement known to man. Even the ones that everyone else loves, best among them the Samsung, Jawbone and BlueAnt. And they're all fine, up to a point. Some easier to keep paired than others, some more comfortable than others, some louder than others, some better voice quality than others. All have drawbacks that, for me, offset any advantages.

The Contour SurfaceSound Compact Bluetooth Speakerphone is different. Pairing it is a painless process, and it's a slim unit that clips to the visor in your car. That's it, you're set. The mic arm folds up to power the unit off. If the phone rings, swing the arm down and the unit automatically connects with your phone and answers. And the speaker is fantastically, wonderfully loud (unlike, say, the iPhone's built-in speakerphone). You'd think the mic being so near the speaker would result in echo, but the cancellation works perfectly.

It charges with a proprietary cable, which is irksome... but it's a USB cable, which is always nice, since you can use your laptop when an outlet isn't handy. At a street price of $59.99, it's priced in the high end for this category, but even at that price it's still cheaper than all the $20 and $30 headsets and speakers sitting in my drawer. In fact, it's so good that when I get out of the car I bring it inside and clip it to a lamp in my office.

If you decide to buy it, it would be great if you use the link below. As with all Amazon purchases you launch from this blog, my cut goes to the Humane Society and the ASPCA.


Scarborough Gets Reamed by The Daily Show, Then Begs For More

Last week:

The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Corporate SynerJoe
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Political HumorNewt Gingrich Unedited Interview


Then, last night:

The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Morning Joe's Sarcastic Starbucks Sponsorship
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Political HumorNewt Gingrich Unedited Interview

Colbert in Iraq: Head Shaved by Order of the President

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Obama Orders Stephen's Haircut - Ray Odierno
colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorIraq

Sunday, June 07, 2009

Dr. John "Iko Iko"

Once and For All, Can We Please Admit Ronald Reagan Was Not Funny?

Chris Matthews, among many others, STILL quotes Ronald Reagan's "jokes"... especially "There you go again." Even today, it's still invoked on cable news as some sort of high watermark of political wit. Sarah Palin even clumsily quoted the line in a vice presidential debate, interrupting the flow of her clumsily saying everything else.


Unlike Sarah Palin, however, "There you go again" is not a joke. Not by any definition. Has no actual joke structure or even content. Worse, it's not funny. Never was. If anything, it's just a cheap way to belittle what your opponent just said without having to refute it. Kind of the definition of being a douchebag.

It seems even more so when you watch the actual clip and see what Reagan was responding to. President Carter was pointing out that Reagan began his political career campaigning against Medicare. Which is completely, 100% true. (You can listen to the proof here, if you can stand it.) So when he denied it, Ronald Reagan was lying. There you go again.

President Carter was also talking about how this country needed national health care. Which we still desperately need and still don't have. Because douchebag politicians still trot out the old Reagan "socialized medicine" wheeze. So there you go again.

See, the reason we have videotape and Google and all that is so we can eventually realize that the people we made fun of at the time may have deserved better. Yes, Sinead O'Connor tore up a picture of the Pope on
SNL, but do you remember why? It was to protest the Church's silence on the sexual abuse of children by priests. If it seemed funny and crackpottish to you at the time, does it still?

And can we finally admit that Al Gore was right about the "lockbox"? And that sighing in exasperation when George W. Bush was debating was actually the sensible response?

Only when we cleanse our media of the myths of the past can we begin the serious work of fighting the myths of the present.

Friday, June 05, 2009

A Kitten, So Close Yet Sofa Away

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

"I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here!" Certainly Took a Strange Turn Tonight

John Salley won a challenge no one saw coming.



Friday, May 29, 2009

What Happens When You Cross SQL Server, Chess and a Painful-Looking Erection? Confusion.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Almost as Good as LeBron James' Game-Winning Shot


Cleveland's Channel 5 News anchors had given up hope... a little too soon. I love that even the on-air talent wasn't watching the show.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Steny Hoyer Manhandles Nancy Pelosi

Hoyer is either getting handsy or has decided to throw Pelosi out a window. Either way it's really strange.


Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Ellen DeGeneres' Great Commencement Speech at Tulane

And I am in shock: I seriously, completely, always thought the Pussycat Dolls were saying "boobies."

Glenn Beck, Your Petard is Ready

Occasionally, The View comes through. Case in point: this appearance by unstable douche Glenn Beck, who made Whoopi and Barbara angry. And he won't like then when they're angry.


He gets caught in some lies. Small lies, but whenever I read or hear something in the media about a subject I personally know about, and it's completely wrong, I wonder why I trust the media on anything else?

Anyway, even though Glenn Beck is low-hanging fruit, it's nice to see him get personally plucked, and called out for being the crap-sack he so is.

Though as always I'm bothered by Barbara saying at the end "I'm sure you meant well." What? No, he didn't. He lied. In this case about something trivial, but still, why kiss his ass? Particularly when he's so unapologetic.

And another thing that always strikes me when I see footage of Beck or Limbaugh doing their radio shows: Why do such wealthy men have such shitty webcams? Seriously, it's baffling.

On a happier note, Beck's lie reminded me of the night the
Duckman writers and producers went to the Ace Awards (remember those?). We get up from our table to get a bite from the BBQ buffet -- leaving our coats and handbags and such -- and when we came back a certain CNN correspondent and his posse had stolen our table! We protested politely and were rebuffed impolitely.

When some men put on tuxes they become James Bond. Then there are those of us who become Otis P. Driftwood. So, naturally, we flung crawfish at them until they got up and left in a huff. (Actually a minute and a huff)

Anyway, please to enjoy:


William Shatner Sings to George Lucas

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Brave Dog Diverts Traffic When His Mom is Struck by a Car

A happy ending for both, and cheers to the motorists who, despite the traffic snarl, didn't honk their horns.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Arizona State, Up Close and Personal



When President Obama spoke at ASU, he was characteristically gracious and turned lemons into Arizona Lemonade. If I were so rudely snubbed I either would have cancelled or shown up drunk and recited "suck it" in fifty different languages. Obama, on the other hand, used the moment as a chance to inspire the grads. Shows why he's President, and I am so not. Well-played, sir.

I'm moved, but still pissed. So here is the fantastic
Daily Show segment shedding light on ASU's dimness.


The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c
Arizona State Snubs Obama
thedailyshow.com
Daily Show
Full Episodes
Economic CrisisPolitical Humor

The Jimmy Kimmel - Matthew Fox Staring Contest

Why Don't I Ever Run Into Shoppers Like This?

This Victoria's Secret ad either depicts every mall cop's fantasy, or is a cautionary tale about waiting until laundry day to do your shopping.


Thursday, May 14, 2009

Cap and Trade


I am a big fan of Brooke Shields, the Sport of Kings,
Clothes Off Our Back, and Grey Goose vodka, separately. But I cannot claim to be a fan of the hat that brought the four of them together. Still, when said hat is being auctioned off to benefit the Barnstable Brown Foundation, a very worthy cause, I am happy to point you to where you can bid on it, along with lots of other cool items for two other great charities: Clothes Off Our Back.



Sunday, May 10, 2009

Yoo-Hoo

I always loved frosty, delicious Yoo-Hoo when I was growing up. And I was always fascinated by the idea (or was it legend?) that it was sterile until you opened it. Sort of the ultimate freshness guarantee.

But my dear friend Richard Samson once pointed something out that changed the way I looked at Yoo-Hoo forever: That "Shake It!" on the label seems oddly bossy for a beverage.


Yoo-Hoo, Shake it!, originally uploaded by jasoncalacanis