Wednesday, April 12, 2006

The Killer Queen

When I heard that Americal Idol was doing the songs of Queen, I had three reactions:

1. I was psyched, because there are a lot of great songs.

2. I knew Bucky and Taylor would have to leg-wrestle over who sang "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" and who sang "Fat Bottomed Girls."

3. I knew Chris would sing "Somebody to Love."

Obviously, I was wrong on #3, and I still don't understand why. Chris, what were you thinking?! This is, IMHO, the best song in the Queen canon, and certainly one of the most difficult songs of the rock era. (Too big for Elliott, who tried but just missed.)

Had Chris done it, it would have been just the kind of magic Simon was talking about. Instead he sang that forgettable, obscure song. He sang the hell out of it, but it was just another great Chris performance instead of being a great Idol moment.

Anyway, back to what did happen:

The show begins with a shot of Fantasia in the audience. I thought I left strict instructions after last season that I never wanted to see her again. Heads will roll if it happens again.

Then we get a tape package of the contestants going to meet Queen. Ryan informs us that "the Idol finalists were pumped on the way to meet this legendary band." If anyone has any videotape of Katharine or Kellie being pumped, I'm willing to pay cash.

Bucky was the sucky. If this guy isn't back in cowpie country by tomorrow there is no God.

Ace somehow managed to turn "We Will Rock You" into a feminine hygiene ad. I swear, he is like the kind of singer you'd see when Nash Bridges used to do a show set in a "rock club."

As for Paris, I am with Simon, I'm sorry. It was weird. There was an episode of Huff last season where Oliver Platt had two "little people" hookers come to the door, and if I remember correctly, their hair and outfits were identical to what Paris wore last night. She scares me.

Like the judges, I was terrified for poor Kellie when she said she was going to do "Bohemian Rhapsody"... but she was great (after a shaky beginnning.) And Katharine was also fantastic, also after a shaky beginning. Although given Katharine's natural dewiness, lip gloss and face glitter seem like overkill.

I'd pick Katharine, Kelly, and Elliott as the standouts. Chris would have been the best, but he loses points for degree of difficulty. Simon's right, it's becoming self-indulgent.

3 comments:

gina said...

Mike! Get out of my head!

(well, except for the Kellie part, lol)

Michael Markowitz said...

And, I assume, for the "videotape of pumping" part. ;-)

Let's face it, we're the same person, except you had the guts to do the Marlee Matlin joke that I backed away from. I am jealous of your sis, getting to watch with you and Marty.

That mike stand kick was the funniest thing ever.

Jimmy Kimmel said that doing the Queen show without singing "We Are the Champions" or "Another One Bites the Dust" is like doing a Weird Al show and no one does "Beat It" :-)

I like that Ryan lost his beard, except that it smeared onto Chris.

And you're right Katharine should lose that top. Preferably on air.

gina said...

You assume correctly.

And yes, it is fun to watch it with someone else. Marty sleeps right through all the screeching and laughing. ;)